million dollar baby

so i am blasting switchfoot thru my roomate's surround sound system in the living room, and me sitting on the couch typing this blog ....
i just went and saw Million Dollar Baby with Andrea and her aunt, i was kinda dissappointed at the ending , which is a pretty surprising ending , i didn't think it would happened that way, anyways, another thought provoking movie, what have you done with your life, what have i done with my life, have we ever gone out and fight, fight for our dreams, yet once we get to the top, or on the way to the top we get the blow, the blow from someone else, from circumstances ... the blow from the most unexpected person ... climbing the ladder of dreams are not easy, you know it , i know it ... is it so much about fame or is it for the game?
i don't know ... sometimes we are just stuck in this cycle ... stand , climb and fall like the song by Lifehouse , once you get to the top, so what? a few things to brag about , but that's about it .. ain't it funny? haha .. remember this rap by Kanye West ..
" It seems we living the american dream
But the people highest up got the lowest self esteem
The prettiest people do the ugliest things"
is it all?
the American dream ...
i see people working at that everyday,
i found myself at that sometimes,
what exactly is that?
own a house? own a car? marry your college sweet heart?
computer engineer? be the next Donald Trump? or Bill Gates ...
or is that our dream to be the next Billy Graham?
the next Jim Elliot ..
i don't know what dream do you have,
i am still struggling with my own,
i am a software engineer ...
is that all?
i know there's more to life than this,
but when and how,
which way should we go,
just like DMB singing .. "Where are we going .... i have no answer for you"
there's life in Christ,
i agree .....
and what will Christ wants us to fight for ....
what is that dream ..
what is that fight ...
do we really find that out
or do we just pretend we know
and think we are at the top of that game too ..
and are we waiting for a blow to bring us down too?
i guess i am just tired of it all ..
like Maggie in the Million Dollar Baby,
she saw the world,
she saw the fame,
she got the fame,
she's winning the game,
then it came the blow,
she can never make it up again,
and she asks for death ..
are we to that point yet,
to the point of asking the death to ourselves
have we seen the world and say it's just vanity,
and live for something else,
something bigger,
better,
and that would be God.

still i'm singing Spirit ,
take me in your arms with you ...
O... i am a second man now
and You are raising the dead in me

24 - Switchfoot,

~daniel